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Friday, May 29, 2015

My CGPA Score And The Words I Just Had To Say

I do not have a lot to talk about my scores or show off or try to elevate my standards.Standards too,very often do not depend upon scores.
I scored a non-upgraded CGPA 10 (The grade point of two subjects can be upgraded if you have scored 'A's in your co-curricular activities.) 
The results were more of an answer to all the injustices I have been subjected to over these two academic years (2013-2014 and 2014-2015) than a cause of happiness.I was very scared and tensed almost all the time,even about power point presentation,model making or seminar scores and let me tell you,that is not normal from any sense.I have a terrible exam phobia and I have never been able to get rid of it till date.
To start with it all,I have studied from Class III to Class X at Techno India Group Public School. I will let my personal experience at the school stay very personal but it was an extremely bad experience to spend the long days during the span of the entire examinat
ion process.We had to give 5 exams over 20 days! And of course,the delay before the declaration of the result,date failures made matters even worse,at least for me.I was unable to resume my normal activities for a very long time.In fact,I can't remember the last time I even cared to properly think about anything or concentrate after 23rd March.

I am happy that now I can move on with my Class XI syllabus without worrying much about the past.I do feel a lot less heaved up right now.

In these two months after exams were over,I have experienced a lot of all you can experience after exams,all the negative things I mean.
But I can say this,that 28th May is when I smiled properly for the first time ever after 22nd February and that wretched Sunday evening when my friend,with whom I really loved conversing,with whom I shared my secrets,whom I trusted without a reason bid me farewell without caring to mention the cause.It was an evening that came with the first signs of spring and it was much warmer than it was throughout winter but it was awfully cold to face something like that just a week before my board exams.In fact,to admit the truth,from two days after that I could not imagine how I would even manage to sit for the exams.I do not know how I managed to gather the strength I needed after that but I am so thankful to God that I could.
I am so,so thankful.However,I thank you,too for gifting me the perhaps happiest days of my life.

I do not have an entire account to write on this issue,I just would very specially like to thank my parents (especially Mom for her support),Principal Sir Mr.S.P Sinha (also our Chemistry teacher) Sohag Sir (our Maths teacher),Madhumita Mam (our Economics teacher).
Among others,I would like to thank Lalita Mam,Kavita Mam,Soma Mam,Suparna Mam and the entire primary wing unit.Though most of the primary wing teachers were not connected to me professionally,Thank You Ayan Sir (our Sports Instructor) for letting us skip our Taekwondo classes (I am awfully bad at most of the sports and related activities.) Most of the time we made the stupidest excuses possible to skip Taekwondo classes.
And Thank You Bratin Sir for giving me the opportunity to spend a day with two lovely kids (Brainiac Arkadip and Would-be-Lawyer Nabendu.I still can't express how much I loved my time with you both,despite the fact that you were so immature and stupid at times and naughty the next) alongside attending a very interesting quiz competition.
Thank You to Pink Floyd,David Gilmour especially,for singing 'Green Is The Colour' and Thank You Bob Dylan,Joan Baez,Pete Seegar,Edvard Munch,Van Gogh,thank you Alfonso Cuaron,George Clooney,Sandra Bullock(Thank You for 'Gravity','A Time To Kill','The Lake House'.),Leonardo DiCaprio,Kate Winslet,Keanu Reeves (especially for the performance in 'The Lake House'.) Thank You Leo Tolstoy,Sukanta Bhattacharya,Jibanananda Das,the Bay of Bengal,the Atreyee,this town and all the people who have helped me from here.

Thank You Eugena.I don't know how much or how to thank you.I woke up after that storm that raged over the heart of the town at night and I was devastated inside.You had been the most warm person who encouraged me at that moment,like that.I would never have achieved the confidence I did then hadn't I talked to you.You are one of the most inspiring people I have ever met.Thank You for comforting me,for encouraging me then.I really,really thank you.An honest thanks from the heart (more than that from the mind).

Thank You Che!I don't know where I would have gone if I didn't have you! Thank You Red.Thank You to all my surroundings.Thank You to Rabindranath Tagore and Nazim Hikmet (you're my best ever poet,comrade).Thank You to Maths itself as a subject,Thank You Economics,Thank You Social Sciences,Science,Thank You Literature,Thank You every other subject,Thank You to the white flag I used to stare everyday at night during the exam session and feel to keep walking or driving throughout the night.Thank You to the street lamp that created a mysterious hallow of light and made my vision cloudy almost everyday.Every single day.Thank You to the breeze and dusty winds that makes the wind chime ring,thank you rain.Thank You Sunshine,you almost always make me high.Thank You Protim da,you are my best ever elder brother.I can't forget all the fun we have had and that I always talked to you before all my exams,even at late night to relieve my own tension and you always helped me out.Thank You to all I have not yet thanked in this post.
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  1. Congratulations on your result. You proved yourself and I can totally understand thw relief and the fact that you smiled properly after months. Happened with me too recently after I gave my final year medical exams, the entire period was nothing short of a torture and there were so many phases of highs and lows before the result finally came. It actually feels so good when it all ends on a good note, no?
    Party now because after 2 years thw history shall repeat itself :D
    Good luck!

  2. Thank You so much,Sarah.I too can understand your relief and satisfaction right now. Since both my parents are doctors,I have heard a lot of how much pressure one has to deal with in medical school.You must be proud to be a doctor now?
    It does feel good when you take heed of your own dreams without letting the negatives affect you as much.

  3. Congrats, Titans. You left nothing more to conquer :)


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